Social TIP : Dont ever go in a Spanish shop and explain to the confused owner that in Svenska this means "going to the toilet for the 2nd time" . They tell you to get out.

He soon realised in the morning that some prank was played when he crashed out at the party the night before.

Lesson #732 : Never take a photo of a diabetic pigeon in a candy store, they attack you.

I am no Kurt Wallander but its 7 am , the towels are out on the sunchairs. They are held by clothes pegs. I believe the Germans are here.

Unplugged Cigarette machine outside a Spanish Pharmacy, so many questions , one answer ,SMOKE LIFE BAAABY!!

Everytime he complained , but everytime they made him goalkeeper

Everyone has a favourite member of ABBA. I think mine was the white headed one , no beard and no face. ANGELEYES

I bought chocolates for 11kr with a 500kr , now i just have my chocolates,489 more chocolates and no money , I am a broke ,fatter ,willy wonka.

How did Helsinki airport know i would wear my michael jackson billie jean outfit ?? Its a Saturday.

First rule of Comedy/ Graffiti and everyday life in Finland. Ask for alcohol whenever, wherever.

I asked my mate who is driving, " can you drop me off on the right ?" , his head has exploded

You realise its a small town you are doing a show in , When you check-in at hotel reception , go to your room and someone at the end of your bed says "Shhhhh, we are reading"

Because he was the only person in history to pay 10kr for a PÅTÅR. They named some bread after him.

Swedish Baby House Maffia

Swedish , during the week. English on the weekend. Germans get nothing.

Yes it freaked me out , No, i didnt know it was a childrens slide as well. So when it started shitting little kids out , I ran

After the car crash and 2 weeks in hospital , Leffe regretted saying to Hasse "Go on , I dare you "

New Calorie Cameras (CCTV) installed on Stockholm Tunnelbana. You Grab chocolate and you are grabbed by the obesity police.

Jahaaaa , Its Swedish Summertime!! Im off to get my bikini wax

The owners of Brothers, knew the annual sale would bring big crowds , so they installed the best Swedish security gate.

3 rolls for the visit to the toilet that goes 3D.

Hair Studio - They wiil pull off 20% to 70% of your hair at the counter

Man taken to hospital after telling friends , " Watch me ride through the forest "

The HISS Inspector

I knew by his face , he was running late

Did this , it was a nightmare in the kitchen

The Cafe of Narnia

If only Captain Scott had gone this way !! The North Pole seems so much closer

I am not a Diva but I do have backstage, before show demands . Must be 3 pairs of 3D glasses , 1 black and 2 green and 2 mature bananas .

I dont think they own a NO DRINKING SYMBOL or they think you do the Drinking and then you go do the smoking

Sverige Intructions : I am sure its much quicker to go the other way round.